Three factors for maintaining intimacy

COMMITMENT

Parental commitment is the decision to work with your partner and consider long-term plans. These plans can be for a pleasant collaboration for sharing parenting responsibilities.

Commitment may include a promise to do certain activities, such as :

  • Taking care of the baby every other night.
  • Doing a pleasant activity as a couple once a week

By committing to sharing baby care tasks, you create a partnership as a couple, and this promotes intimacy in the relationship.

Relationship satisfaction

The presence of a child can increase the stability of the couple, but it can also compromise relationship satisfaction. In other words, parenthood can decrease relationship satisfaction while strengthening commitment. This is why it is important to nurture relationship satisfaction.

Relationship satisfaction is maintained through various daily actions, such as:

  • Demonstrating that you care about the happiness and fulfilment of the couple ;
  • Encouraging your partner to take time for themself (e.g., go for a walk, visit friends);
  • Showing the other person attention and kindness (e.g., acknowledge qualities that you appreciate in them);
  • Focusing on what you like about your partner ;
  • Reminding the other person that they are still desirable.

Communication and family climate

New parents intuitively make caring for the baby their top priority (e.g., feeding, affection, hygiene). However, this very often results in a tendency to neglect essential relationship needs.

  • Set aside time to communicate in the absence of children.
  • Do not assume that you know the other person’s feelings or mental state.
  • Validate each other’s emotions.